Negotiations are unavoidable in both business and personal life.
Many people agonize over whether to wait for the other party to make the first move or to initiate themselves. From a psychological perspective, however, taking the initiative is overwhelmingly advantageous.
This article explains the concept of “anchoring” to gain leverage in negotiations and step-by-step request techniques to get the other party to say “Yes.”
1. Why Should You Take the Initiative in Negotiations?
In negotiations, presenting your terms first is synonymous with taking control.
Gaining the Upper Hand with the Anchoring Effect
Psychological research shows that the first number or condition presented becomes a “reference point (anchor)” that strongly influences subsequent judgments.
By presenting your terms first, the other party is forced to base their thinking on that anchor.
Even if the final outcome isn’t exactly what you hoped for, starting with a high demand can still give the other party a sense of satisfaction that they “got you to compromise.”
2. The “Low-Ball Technique” to Skyrocket Acceptance Rates
The Low-Ball Technique exploits the psychological tendency to resist reversing a “Yes” once given (the principle of consistency).
What is the Low-Ball Technique?
This technique involves presenting only favorable terms the other party is likely to accept to secure their agreement, then later adding unfavorable conditions or revoking the favorable terms.
【Experimental Example】
In an experiment psychologist Cialdini conducted with students, the participation rate was significantly higher when he simply asked them to participate in an experiment and then later revealed, “Actually, it starts at 7 a.m.,” compared to honestly asking them to participate in an experiment starting at 7 a.m.
※Important Note: If it becomes apparent that you intentionally concealed unfavorable conditions, you risk losing trust. It is crucial to use this approach only within the bounds of honest communication.
3. Make Requests in Stages: Foot-in-the-Door vs. Door-in-the-Face
When making a request, a more effective approach than stating your main point directly is to use a “two-step” method.
① Foot-in-the-Door (Gradual Persuasion Method)
Start with a very small request the other party is certain to agree to.
This leverages the psychological tendency (self-perception theory) where people feel inconsistent if they refuse a subsequent request after accepting the first.
Small request (accepted) → Main request
② Door-in-the-Face (Concession Request Method)
First, deliberately present a large (unreasonable) request you expect to be refused.
This leverages the “guilt” felt after refusing and the principle of reciprocity (“I should compromise since they did”).
Large request (refused) → Main request (presented as a concession)
4. Utilizing the “Double Bind” to Eliminate the Option to Refuse
A double bind is a technique that forces the other person to choose between “A or B” rather than making them consider “Yes or No.”
Specific Examples of How to Make the Invitation
- Bad Invitation Approach
“Would you like to grab a bite sometime?” → This forces the other person into a yes-or-no choice. - Effective Invitation Approach
“Would you prefer sushi or Italian next time?” → This shifts the other person into “what to eat” mode, making them more likely to assume going is the default.
Summary｜Master Negotiation Skills for Smooth Communication
Negotiations and requests aren’t just about back-and-forth arguments.
By understanding human psychology and applying techniques at the right moment, you can find mutually agreeable solutions.
- Take the initiative to establish a benchmark (anchor)
- Secure initial agreement before finalizing details
- Build a “hard-to-refuse situation” step by step
- Present options and “have them choose”
Put these skills to work to gain an edge in business and everyday communication.
